#I'm still gonna write more later
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Fuck it, I have too many thoughts about mer au Jazz and Prowl and how they met, I'm not confining my ramblings to the tags anymore. Text post be upon ye. @keferon for their apocalyptic ponyo au
Everyone has been writing such excellent ideas for jazz and prowl, and I'm gonna add my own.
language barrier my beloved, jazz can understand humans, maybe even MULTIPLE human languages due to getting bounced around a lot, but doesn't have enough practice with mer and can only speak in a bastardized chimera version that is 10 different dialects in one ugly torn up trenchcoat. And also it's limping. He only knows that much in the first place because that's what he was able to pick up from the short conversations he has with other trapped mers.
Meanwhile Prowl doesn't know ANY human speech because as far as the merfolk are concerned, humans are like land dolphins; smart and cute but also clever enough to know it and very capable of being assholes. Still not as intelligent as them though, and language being a mystery to merfolk. Like, Prowl will recognize certain tones and gestures, sure, but he doesn't know enough to be able to hold a conversation. He didn't know they could even DO that!
which leaves them both in an awkward position. Neither knows the other's language enough to hold a proper conversation, and Jazz is woefully very very unpracticed speaking with another mer (the humans were scared Jazz would eat/hurt any other rare mer that gets put in the same tank as him so Jazz remained woefully alone alone ALONE).
Jazz overhears the humans talking about bringing another orca mer in with him and he is SO EXCITED!!! Finally, FINALLY!!! Something new, something different, and stars and moon above, something that can TALK and treat him like a PERSON!!
because he IS a person, he IS! The humans took a lot away from him and treat him like a dumb animal, but he knows he isn't, he's smart, he's clever, and he is so so SICK of not being treated like a PERSON.
and this orca will be with him for an extended period of time! Not just a small wave or quick snatches of simple conversation during performances or check ups. The orca will be WITH him, long enough to TALK.
Long enough to plot, even!
So Jazz is maybe a little overenthusiastic when Prowl wakes up from being drugged and Prowl maybe doesn't react super well to a strange orca after having just recently fallen asleep from trying to nurse his wounds from the LAST orca mers he met.
then you add language barrier on top of that and the two are kinda just left there staring warily at each other.
no matter! Jazz has a goal and by the MOON he is going to GET it.
Call Jazz an octopus with the way he keeps escaping captivity (sometimes he sees them on his own nightly escapes and it makes him laugh at seeing the little guys be just as bored and disdainful with captivity as he is), but he still hasn't actually. you know. ESCAPED escaped. But with Prowl here, he has a better chance!
Prowl REMEMBERS the outside! Remembers what the ocean is like, clearly is old enough and experienced enough to have lived to adulthood, and maybe! remembers how close to the ocean this place actually is!
Prowl has INFORMATION and Jazz does not. He needs information if he is ever going to get OUT of here and get back to where the water is not Wrong and Forward doesn't run out after 5 idle tail swishes, and also not DIE immediately in the new waters because Jazz isn't stupid. He knows this place isn't the ocean and knows his chances of surviving in the ocean after spending most of his life in captivity is going to be low. It's going to be one hell of an adjustment.
(I'm starting to realize why I'm constantly running out of tags in the posts now, wow, this is getting long. Better go put this under a read more)
Jazz is going to need information if he is ever going to get HOME.
(but what is home? Is home a fuzzy, blurry memory that he doesn't remember anymore? He doesn't even remember what the water felt like anymore, he only knows that the water here is WRONG)
(What a joke. To remember enough that the water feels Wrong, but not enough to remember when it was right)
Well Home sure as hell isn't HERE, so Jazz is going to get OUT, and this new mer here is going to help him!
Meanwhile on Prowl's end, he just woke up from being poisoned by the humans and is trapped in a weird artificial ocean. He must be in one of those structures the humans like to build, and as fascinating as it is to BE in one such structure. It also does not bode well for getting BACK to the ocean because humans are very infamously land bound.
Then all of a sudden a weird loud orca mer is in his face and speaking in the most dizzying language he's ever had spoken to him. One klik and it's the low, loud notes of the open sea dialect, the next klik it's the rapid staccato of the lake dialect, and in another klik it's the sing song tones of the northern foggy dialect! Prowl can barely keep up, even as the mer is clearly slowing down to speak with him.
Prowl doesn't know and he doesn't care, the other mer is a stranger and Prowl doesn't know WHAT is going on. Is he one of the orcas that fought Prowl earlier, who ended up getting dragged here with him? Is he a random orca that just HAPPENED to also be caught?
The chances of a random orca being here by coincidence is low, and so Prowl assumes it's an orca who had tried to come back after him to finish the job but got caught along with him.
It doesn't explain the horrifying butchered language being spoken to him however.
Unfortunately for Jazz, Prowl is still keyed up from being injured and now from being poisoned, so he whistles harshly "STAY BACK" at him anyways, and Jazz doesn't know what was just said, but he can tell when hackles are raised as well as anybody else, so he raises his hands and slowly backs away.
It takes a couple more tries and several hours of being in each other's company where nothing happens before they both calm down enough to actually get anything done. They both want to escape, and they both can't understand each other.
Yet.
Prowl pantomiming "what is your name?" to Jazz and Jazz replying with a very distinctly human noise of "Jazz".
Jazz immediately clocking in the sneer/pity on Prowl's face at the name and he is Offended! Like, it's HIS name! HE chose it, and so help him Moon, Prowl is NOT allowed to be all judgey about it. So he likes jazz music! Sue him! He's allowed to name himself whatever he wants!
Because stars forbid he get to decide anything else about his own life.
If he wants to name himself after a human noise, then he will name himself after a human noise! He doesn't want to hear anything from Mr. "low throat rumble with a weird echoing undertone to it", whatever that means. He's going to call him Purr for short. Isn't that nice, now they BOTH get to have human names.
"Is it JazzProwl if they're not lying to each other about something?" Now it's a a little tricky given their language barrier, less opportunities TO lie, but I live to please, and I can work with this.
Jazz is a performer. He knows how to put on a show. He's done nothing BUT put on a show his whole life.
Act cute. Act docile. Act dumb. This is what protects you.
Jazz is TOO used to putting on a show. He automatically hides his intelligence and skills from Prowl.
Wait no, even better: Prowl lies to Jazz about something, taking advantage of the fact that Jazz doesn't understand mer language yet or is ignorant about something. Maybe he lies about what someone said to them or maybe he's lying about a secret. Or maybe he's just lying because Jazz is one weird and suspicious orca and Prowl just doesn't trust like that.
Either way, Jazz realizes it and gets so so so MAD that Prowl is treating him like a dumb animal just like the humans did and THAT'S when Jazz starts acting dumber and less competent than he actually is, because if Prowl wants a dumb animal, then he's GETTING a dumb animal.
Jazz starts pretending that he doesn't understand what Prowl is saying, even when he does, and he doesn't do things to help even when he COULD, but it would leave him vulnerable/involve trusting Prowl to hold up his end of the deal. I.e., they need to get to the other side of a collapsed building but the only way through is up and over. And Prowl doesn't do "up". Jazz does, but in order to do it, he'd need to trust Prowl to lift him over, or maybe there's like, mutant birds in the area (or just regular seagulls, the vicious little fuckers) and he'd need Prowl to keep watch or something along those lines. Or maybe it would just hurt to go over the wall because there's broken glass on the ground, and he COULD hurt himself to go over, and then help Prowl follow through without hurting him, but Jazz decides to not let Prowl know that he can go over the wall. They go to find another way around.
Act dumb. Dumb is what protects you. Performing keeps you safe.
Well this got HELLA long, so I'm going to cut it off here. Plus I am eepy. Time to hit post and leave this for future me to find every spelling mistake ever, later. Or never. Who's to say.
I am just Consumed with mer thoughts. They must be released.
Edit: i cut this one a little short cuz it was getting long, so here’s a second part. Bonus content let’s goooo.
#my posts#my writings#apocalyptic ponyo#transformers stuff#mer au#tf jazz#tf prowl#writing ideas#worldbuilding#wow this is stupid long. I probably should have like. separated it#oh well hit post.#long posts#long post be upon ye#read my jazz prowl content and be happy#i will probably do another one later because I am just Consumed with ideas and i've just now realized that I can write my thoughts out#in bullet points. they don't HAVE to be in narrative form#it'll be like writing in the tags except i'll have punctuation i can use and italics and no character or tag limit#absolutely fantastic that#edit: sike! I ended up separating the post anyways#I'm still gonna write more later#i just have so many thoughts
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I've been thinking a lot about Leonarda's not-death ever since it happened back in April.
("What death?" you might ask, to which I say: "EXACTLY!")
Back in mid-April, Vegetta and Leonarda were mining together in a one-block wide tunnel. A mob (a Petriman) got between the two of them, and Vegetta told Leonarda to step back while he took care of it. At this point, they'd spent enough time together that he trusted Leo to listen to him.
Instead, she was killed by the same sweeping edge bug that killed her siblings.
-
Vegetta's reaction here is what's really interesting to me. Unlike most other parents on the Island, there are no shouts or tears – only a very brief "Hmm" and then silence. He very quietly takes stock of the situation, saying "Vegetta, no" and wondering aloud why Leo didn't defend herself. In chat, Foolish says "It was a bug, right? LAG" to which Vegetta slowly responds "Yes, lag. Bug." (Despite this, Foolish still asks "WHAT HAPPENED" in chat, though Vegetta doesn't reply).
Instead, he creates a slightly wider space in the tunnel where Leo's body is. He continues quietly taking stock of the situation, wondering why Leo didn't defend herself (which is what necessitated his intervention). She'd been lagging a lot that day, and he figures that must be the cause, and eventually when Leo re-appears out of thin air in the middle of the cave and collects her stuff, she confirms that the lag got to her and that's why she didn't fight the mob.
Now here's where things get interesting:
Vegetta checks the tab list. Online, it's just him, Leonarda, Roier, and Foolish. He quietly tells Leonarda "The body has already disappeared, and without a body, there is no crime. Nothing is happening. Did you die?" Leo shakes her head, and Vegetta shakes his head too, and in the kind voice he uses sometimes with Leo, he says: "I believe you have not died. Where is the body? It isn't anywhere, no mija. If it was a mistake, it was a mistake."
Leo says: "I saw Diosito (God) pa, and I was scared. God, what am I doing here?" and Vegetta laughs, telling her it's alright. Leo says "No pasa nada (don't worry / nothing happened)" and Vegetta says: "And the people who are watching us have not seen it either." To Foolish and Roier, he messages: "Secreto."
And the funniest thing about this is it worked.
Not a single person spoke about it. I saw this entire event go down live and I didn't see a WHISPER of what transpired among fans. I can't even remember if the QSMP official accounts talked about it (they sure didn't mention it in Vegetta's recap of the day). We could discuss this in meta terms of course– Leo was having known lag issues that day, Vegetta's beloved by the admins so of course they're willing to turn a blind eye rather than slap a "?" over Leonarda's life on the Eggstatistics, but meta talk isn't what I'm interested in here.
I'm interested in q!Vegetta, the weird "god-adjacent" aura he's got, and the way the universe bends to his will.
Before he took a break from the server, Rubius seemed to be a caretaker for the Eggs who died (for example, he was present when Maxo, Quackity, and Mariana & Slime said their final goodbyes to Trumpet, Tilin, and JuanaFlippa). Because of his role as an "angel" and some of his dialogue during the early days of the server, it's not a stretch to say he probably came to collect any Egg who lost a life. I can imagine he did the same when he saw Leonarda die – that is, until Vegetta said "And the people who are watching us have not seen it either." Realistically, we know Vegetta was saying this to Chat (and possibly the admins as well), but again, we're looking at this from an "in-universe" perspective.
I wonder if Vegetta was aware of Rubius' role, and this was his way of telling Rubius "No. I won't allow that to happen." We know Rubius has a soft-spot for Vegetta (and we also know that Rubius was cast out of heaven several months later) so it makes me wonder if these two instances are connected.
Either way, this isn't the first time the laws of the QSMP universe have bent for Vegetta, and I certainly don't think it'll be the last.
Rubius or no, Leo didn't die that day.
Vegetta made sure of it.
#i talk#QSMP talk#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#I FOUND IT#I wrote this post TWO MONTHS AGO#MAYBE LONGER!!!#I had clips and links prepared but I have no idea where those went#I'm not gonna bother saving this as a draft and risk losing it again#I have nearly 70000 drafts on my main blog but by some miracle this got saved in my art blogs' drafts instead#than the stars#Anyways. Leo was killed by a whale a few days later because Foolish was in the bathroom lmao#''powerful god-adjacent man who bends the laws of the universe'' vs. ''man whose entire life is a series of sitcom episodes''#I still really want to write out that ''QSMP genre'' thought I had ages ago. It's still relevant and always will be relevant#but anyways#I wrote this months ago on very little sleep but DANG. It's a banger.#I miss writing analysis stuff I wish I was in a headspace where I could do this more like I used to#QSMP analysis
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I made a 4 hour 9-1-1 deep dive because this show cured my depression (sort of.) anyone in this thread seen Step Up: All In?
#9-1-1#911 abc#911 show#buddie#lol what do I tag this??#youtube#buck x eddie#sorry to exploit so much buddie clickbait you guys#but like what else am I supposed to do#and this video DOES have a buddie tangent so it's not false advertising#oliver stark#ryan guzman#jane mulcahy#still not sure if I have my own tag but I'm gonna make it happen#if you're a big Eddie Diaz fan be aware I am kind of mean to him when I first talk about him BUT stay in line#I'm more considerate later in the video#and also I'm only critiquing the writing of the character I still like him a lot#idk I've been getting some comments misunderstanding my take on him imo
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Day 28!!! (Which I actually did on day 2 cause I couldnt contain myself-)
Does this count as ender dragon? I saw the opportunity to link one of my aus and I COULD NOT OASS IT JP-
Mcsmtober by @bumpkin-bug
#minecraft story mode#mcsm#mcsm jack#jack mcsm#clemont_ine#Mcsmtober#mcsm au#I LOCKED IN.#THIS KINDA ATE IM NGL-#Fun fact I'm writing these tags on the second. I'm hoping this still slaps when I go to post it-#UPDATE IT STILL SLAPS LETS GOOOO#I'm meant to do some scare acting later today pray for me guys#Real ones know that I jump at EVERYTHNNG#the children are gonna scare me more than I scare them 😭😭😭#Chimera champion au
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transfem scott getting lots of support from ramona and kim in the early 2000's when shit's very taboo but they all 3 have a fire forged bond and lord if they aren't going to make sure they're all as happy as they can be because they've come this far and I dunno it just makes me happy all three of them
YES YES YES
It makes me very happy as well,,
Like I've said before. General Trans Scott enthusiast here- I love the idea of their little support network *violent coughing* I (we?) mean polycule *violent coughing* so fucking much.
Ramona I think has a bit of a more gentle hand with reassuring Scott with gender issues, but sometimes she just can't help herself from some pointed banter or teasing- how could you with someone so dense? (Said w affection)
And then Kim I think is more blunt. But like, in a good way mostly, you know? The kinda blunt that makes you snap to attention and go "Oh. Yeah that was silly of me." And if Ramona's started some sort of banter? Kim is SO piling on. Maybe sometimes she's a bit TOO blunt with it- but it's only because she's so firm in her support. She wants Scott to Get It Together- and be happier for it. So if some ribbing now and again is in order, then goddamnit she will do so! Anything to crack that shell.
And ohhh can you imagine how they would react to some transphobic bullshit?? Unholy terror would be driven into the offender before they walk off with an absurd amount of coins between them. I can feel it in my bones. Scott doesn't even have to lift a finger (if the transphobe is even noticed/processed at all, bc I honestly can see Scott just. Not realizing someone's being transphobic.) Kim giving someone a lashing with her tongue as distraction and then Ramona coming in with the hammer- BAM! Free Money! Paying literally with your life for your transphobia. A Better And Just World.
And of course (transfem Scott more specifically, here,) the way Scott would start to flourish under their support... cagey and maybe a little (perhaps a lot-) resistant to start- but Kim's blunt affirmations and no nonsense attitude for bullshit (which is what Scott insisting on "being cis" would be, c'mon now,) and Ramona's also low bullshit tolerance but less Stabby (bc I won't lie, that's probably how Kim's comments would feel,) assurances? Ough... My Heart... Be Still-
I would Kill for them, Your Honor-
(Ran out of tags so putting this in the body of the post- I am SO tired someone pls sound off if this isn't as coherent as I am hoping this is. I WAS trying to nap and get the extra sleep I desperately needed but the writing bug... it Bit Me.... only a little but enough to stop that process-)
#for my trans masc scott hcs I am actually so seriously and deeply fond of Kim having been SO supportive of Scott in HS. It's so important +#+to me. it also makes their whole relationship sting a little more but ohhh man. I can just see Kim hyping him up and helping him get more+#+comfortable in his skin. Lisa would definitely help there too imo but just. ahhhhhgshcksjdhg#i need to put some transmasc scott hs stuff on my fic docket. but I have so many wips rn x~x pray for me chat#(literally stopped writing something to answer this dhdjshdjdgw I Am Part Of The Problem-)#as always to people looking for transfem scott stuff I point you towards Scott Pilgrim's Precious Little Egg on AO3- as well as Amy +#+Pilgrim's Precious Little Life (also AO3)#the second has 2 chapters out currently but I believe the 3rd is definitely underway! and then the first has 22 chapters out currently and#+I believe part 3 has just kicked off w that latest one#you've seen some of the authors here before I'm like 99% certain- even if you may not have realized it lol#headcanons#scott pilgrim headcanons#sp comic#spto#spvtw#ramona flowers#kim pine#scott pilgrim#sckimona#(not putting it into ship stuff but like. Definitely what was on the mind)#trans headcanon#trans scott pilgrim#ooc#asks#anon#gmorning all btw. i am still So Tired. I'm gonna try and maybe make more icons today if anyone has any requests? or otherwise I do have +#+some shippy stuff I need to get done. ninjastar edits. vague lukim thing potentially. kinda wanna draw more furry kimona--#i could do furry sckimona..... h m m m m.....#we'll see what happens! admittedly i do also have some Gaming Plans later today and I am helpless but to allow the monopolization of my tim#(fellow lesbians out there will Understand /hj) (if the person i would prefer to have not read that read that Politely Ignore pls-)
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oh yeah i got a new job :')
#✘ — [ ooc ]#FINALLY — ok but honestly#it's still gonna suck because it's right next door to where i'm at now lmao ( hour commute from home )#and the job itself is still gonna be....boring i think because it's still security#but it's full time ! with benefits ! and a somewhat consistent schedule !#which means once i settle in a little i suspect i'll be here more !#my other job has just been#so much stress on me...just because it wasn't enough money to pay the bills and#the constantly changing hours i think really fucked with my head ngl#made it really hard to be here and concentrate on things#so i've just been.......on autopilot on league mostly.#trying not to absolutely lose my shit#shoutout to maddie for helping me keep it together the past few months#you a real one —#but anyway i've got work ( at the old job ) today in a few hours#but maybe...just maybe i'll be around for some things later tonight when i get home.#and by things i mean working on this 12 page essay of a reply i'm writing for maddie#tbd
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7am, eating cold leftover teriyaki stir-fry for breakfast and crying over blorbos
#normal Saturday morning behavior#redacted spoilers#redacted audio#redacted sam#Seven.txt#rp audio stuff#well. crying over one singular blorbo in particular. Sam's still got me in an emotional chokehold#and i'm too sad to even make a stupid little joke abt how i wouldn't mind if it was a physical one too. ayeee *insert sad eyebrow wiggle*#no but seriously. i have so many feelings abt him and i can't even say it all bc some of it isn't public info yet#eh fuck it i'll just draft this until the audio goes public and then i'll post it once it's no longer Exclusive Info#bc i dont wanna leak Early Access stuff but i have to get this out of my system rn and the new audio is part of what sparked these thoughts#which is funny bc i. literally haven't even listened to it yet. i'm not Ready 😭#where's that tiktok screenshot that's like. 'hyperfixation so bad that i can't even engage with the source material' bc that's me rn#like bro Sam only won the poll like. 2 or 3 days ago and Eric is Already dropping a new Sam audio?? hello? Mr. Redacted i wasn't prepared#anyways i was spoiling myself by perusing the comments last night trying to get a feel for if it's gonna be more angst or comfort#and i saw a comment that absolutely shattered me. and it reignited all my sad thoughts about Sam's eventual. uh. y'know. death.#apparently they plant a tree together or smthn in the new audio (which already has me & my beloved 10y/o orange tree feeling some kinda way#but to the individual in the comments who brought to all our minds the image of Sam sitting beneath that tree in 30 or so years time#when he's decided that he's ready to die and sits out there waiting for the sun to rise..................... 🥲#i'm gonna need u to compensate me for all of that unexpected emotional damage /j /nm#i'm Still not over what he told Darlin' while they had their talk about the future up on his roof together. that audio killed me#then yesterday i was listening to my Sam & Darlin' playlist while cleaning. and Malibu Nights by LANY came on. which i always skip bc Sad#but i let it play and just started crying. standing in the middle of the room all disheveled and holding a broom. as one does.#iirc that song is one that Eric himself said is applicable to Sam which is why/how i found it and put it on the playlist. and god. g o d#hm. i hope that wasn't Patreon exclusive info. i can't remember if it was a public post where he said that or not. hope it's okay to share#but if we can take that song as like. unofficial canon for Sam then that also confirms my idea that he used to drink to cope#which makes the opening lines of Fix What You Didn't Break by Nate Smith even more applicable. i should go edit that post actually#anyways i'm just. feeling a lot. and i love Sam very much and i don't want him to die. but i want him to do what he wants at the same time#Alexis took so fucking much from him. he deserves to live - and end - his life on his own terms. ... i think i need to go write something#*casually fishes this post out of the drafts 3 and a half days later* hi so uh. i wrote a 4k oneshot :) and will hopefully post it tomorrow
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Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh today I've been constantly experiencing the urge to un-private today-in-the-devildom & start writing for it again
#i'm gonna ramble in the tags but#i've been talking with starr (if you're reading this--hi starr!! <3) about the blog today and sharing some of the entries#and it just made me miss it so much#+ the conversation actually made me realize some other reasons why i didn't enjoy the blog in general anymore#like i genuinely love the blog and i genuinely loved writing for it & that conversation reminded me of that#but also there were so many reasons that ultimately pushed me to more or less abandon the blog & then later private it too#so i'm kind of at a loss here#tbh i think i'm mostly just scared to pick the blog up again only for it to end exactly like last time i picked it back up#i've actually always wanted for the blog to be a source of inspiration y'know?#like the things mentioned in the entries are kinda just small ideas right#i was hoping that people would read these & feel inspired to write or draw something of their own based on my entries#that was actually what made me start the blog in the first place. the hope that i could inspire others that way#aaahhhhhh.... maybe it's on me since i could have more openly communicated that idea......#i did get to meet one wonderful person who wrote a few fics based on my entries tho!! (hi ali <3)#but yeah..there's that#also the way engagement just dropped significantly after a while#like i know i was gone for a good while & that a lot of people left the fandom and all that#but still getting maybe one reblog if i'm lucky really feels like a punch to the gut#ESPECIALLY considering that i was close to 900 followers on there#do you guys know that feeling when you proudly show someone you care about something you did only to get a disinterested answer?#yeah...#that's essentially how it feels like to me#and well as you might know the feeling of “why should i keep writing if apparently no one cares” eventually won... haha.....#but aaaahhhhh i'm still clinging onto the hope & what ifs here#that conversation with starr really just made me forget about everything that frustrated me about the blog & left me with this#longing feeling to start again lol#hey if you've made it this far into the tags let me just ask--would you care if i picked the blog back up?#would you also *show* that you care?#i'm actually quite curious (you could almost call me george lol)#anyway maybe we'll see each other on today-in-the-devildom again in the future.. who knows
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Jen, v random but I think you follow the whatiwillsay pod? I was wondering if you had thoughts about their larry ep from a couple of years ago?
I do follow her on spotify, but I don't always listen (depends what I have in queue, the topic, etc). I *did* listen to that ep, though, and I disagreed with pretty much all of it MAINLY because you can't have it both ways, i.e., you can't say here's all this gryles proof, here's all this swiftgron proof, then dismiss larry or kaylor when it's the exact same amount of evidenceTM. Like, I'm all for reaching, reach away! But when you're matching, then match it! If it's fandom bullshit, call it as such, but where there's that much smoke, there's at least a wee bit of fire!
#it felt very much like well THIS one is real#but this exact same one isn't lol#all because of some insanity in the fanbase--and i get that#i saw it just recently in fact--like if you're gonna say shit like my ship is real! this 1/2 was pictured by himself in one city!#this 1/2 was pictured with fans in this other city half a world away!#THEY'RE MARRIED!!#it sounds insane because it is#and it means a lot of people will write off EVERYTHING ELSE accordingly#you can show randos outside of fandom early larry proof posts and the will 1000000% get it#but if you try to act like it carries over to today it not only does NOT carry over#it sounds literally insane and negates most of anything else#hence the big anti gap#if more larries left room for jesus (breakups etc) it would be a lot less crazy sounding#and yet!#ditto kaylors!!!!!#so I respect Cam as an outsider thinking hey yeah no#because she CAN accept that her ship (swiftgron) is done and over#but that said i still feel like if you're saying all this proof of gryles being so valid means you can't ipso facto larry NEVER existed#esp when you talk about louis's very clear jealousy...it's not purely just guys being bros who are pals...that just doesn't check out#and once again the fact that larries can't be YES they were a thing but they broke up later and/or it's messy#it has to be gold-star virgins who have only fucked each other#or else you're a full-on anti#well congrats you played yourself and excluded all room for nuance so OF COURSE you'll get podcasts saying larry is bullshit#it ain't that deep#it's also why a lot of this fandom is 'broken' etc#can someone like me be considered a larrie if i think they WERE a thing but they aren't any longer? i'm not saying they can't in the future#but i'd imagine i'm an ex-larrie in the eyes of the lord (redacted shitty blog names) and fine by me!#and yet that's not the full larrie definition you know?#so again OF COURSE podcasts not fully in this gatekeep mindfuck aren't gonna get it or even care#and more power to 'em i say
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found my notepad list of locations to get screenshots of for the travel log series!!!! I thought I lost this lol
#gonna take these screenshots while playing fallout 3#I'll come back to them later when I write the entries#someday#still need to finish the one i've had in my drafts for ages lol#kinda got distracted by literally everything past august lmao#PLUS the stephen fic which I still need to continue..#i did have a moment though of thinking “what's the point?”#bc for some reason I cared briefly if people saw them/read them or not#which sure can suck if you put a lot of work into somebody just for nobody to like or see it#but I also just don't advertise it lmao#i just spaff them out and move on lol#anyway I kinda thought about it more and changed my thinking on it#like SURE the recognition is great! it gives you more motivation to carry things on!#but I realised the main core of why I was doing it was just to prove to myself that I am capable of writing a series!#and having an avenue to more deeply flesh out the gay (and aroace) dudes who live in my head.#PLUS I'm already like? 10 entries in#11 if we count the one in the drafts#and the series is like 24-30ish entries long#so technically I'm like a quarter of the way through ALREADY so I may as well finish it#and if people like it then that's great!#but also I'm like the king of flop-posts so it's whatever lmfao#also the king of getting side-tracked it seems lol#already working on my new years resolution! “talk about how you think/feel more!"
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I'm gonna drop the lore on how my s/i gets with my main f/o other soon, but the writing's gotta cook first. Maybe it'll be ready in a few days.
#ribbits#mainly because I'm one of those crazy people that writes a lot#I think my average is usually between 2000-4000 words whenever I write chapters for fics and oneshots#I'm long winded what can I say#but Im trying to make this writing piece more of a summary than a telling of their entire story#I'm lowkey planning to write a fic for viti and goku about the time between them getting closer and actually realizing they're in love#its gonna be called “a year in a day” whichvwill be explained later#but the current thing Im working on absolutely must come first#yall need to know the lore behind spars and stars it's vital to the blog and my main selfship#but I'm trying really hard atm to not be over explanatory in it#guess we'll all see how it turns out#selfship#self shipping#also working on this in-between making collages for people. there's still so many to make
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gingka and hyoma fic already hit 10k. oops. update coming tuesday
#i think biweekly updates is a very doable goal tbh#i'm working on what is technically chapter 4#(but in my writing doc it's denoted as chapter 3 as there is an interlude/bonus chapter also)#chapter 1 was very hyoma centric and didn't contain much from the canon#except for the green hades#but chapter 2 will start to veer into more canon territory#hyoma my son i am gonna give you a backstory that is so yaoiful so help me god#anyway yeah chapter 2 is written AND beta'd thank you zodi#will be out tuesday#interlude/chapter 3 is also mostly beta'd but minor edits still otw. still 2 weeks before you see that one though#it's taking everything in me not to post early but i know i will NEED this time later#because i have finals coming around the corner#anyway thats enough rambling from me#if you read the tags um merry christmas or happy holidays or whatever i dont celebrate anything this time of year#except my birthday! but that's over a week away#anyway#ao3#beyblade metal fight#gingka/hyoma#From rain
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I fucking HATE how the fandom treats m.ine. it's so bad 😭
#ash rambles 💚#so many shitty takes... too much time on twitter ruins a man#i hear one more person call him a crazy obsessive yandere and i think I'm actually gonna lose it#he's either portrayed like that or as one half of a ship#his actual character is lost on so many people because oOoOOoOOooOoO mInE wAs GaY#i dont doubt that he likes men. it's just that I've seen so many people be weird about it-#also. it's not fucking sexy to wanna kill your partner. a bullet between the eyes isn't an act of love.#I saw a tweet today about how m.ine actually wanted to kill k.iryu because he thought d.aigo liked k.iryu romantically#and m.ine only wants d.aigo to himself. and THAT'S why m.ine wanted to kill k.iryu.#let that sink in. 😐.#i hate how the fandom treats him SO MUCH#i will sit in my corner here. and i will kiss m#m.ine. and we will kiss a lot. and things are good. we are happy. we are far away from all of that.#I'm not saying every fan of his is horrible. I've seen a lot of great stuff and content! but holy shit I've seen some horrible stuff too#and it's hard to not feel like I'm doing something wrong by shipping with him. by loving a guy who the world has always hated.#and ofc I'm not! but still! even whenever i rb content of him here I'm always so afraid ajdhajsj#like ah yes this is the day i finally get cancelled on tumblr dot com for (checks notes) ... shipping with y.oshitaka m.ine??#I'm honestly afraid to take him up to being an official f/o ajdhajsb i think he'll stay in crush jail a little while longer..#i hate how the fandom perceives him so much!!!!!!! i also just hate the y.akuza fandom in general lmao#i do also like k.iryu so.. I've seen shit 😐#I'll delete this later but oh boy i am in a mood#and i know this isnt the first time I've blogged about this#and for that i do apologize. but i really do love this guy and despite wanting to look for content of him i always end up finding the most#infuriating shit!#i know he's done fucked up things. he's not a great guy. but! our relationship is built on mutual trust and i will NEVER write any of that#creepy obsessive shit that the stupid fandom always portrays him as doing! he's not going to kill someone for getting too close to me-#I'm just... upset- get behind me honey! I'll shield you!#and by kissing him I'm not brushing over any of the shit he does in the game. yes he beheaded that guy. yeah he slapped that orphan.#but i adore him and omg i hit tag limit... oopsie daisy lol sorry guys 😭 I'm really sorry for always talking abt this#you were beautiful 💸
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hhhhh-- i was hoping to write some more stuff tonight, since i'll probably be heading out early tomorrow when a friend comes to pick me up... but i still feel so sleepy that all i wanna do is curl up and doze off...
#{|ooc post|}#i also still need to pack-- which i'm gonna try and manage here in a few minutes--#but like-- idk if i'll have it in me to do anything after that lmao#or if i'll just give in and sleep more--#(gonna see if maybe i can stave off the added sleep tho-- as besides writing there is another thing i was hoping to get done before i leave#(also probably gonna sweep through and delete this post later lol-- but for rn-- i just felt the need to whine at the dash a little XP)
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okeydoke as I have not had much energy for working on stuff lately (but lots of motivation) I'm not gonna do proper NaNo with a wordcount or anything, BUT I am gonna make it a goal to get some amount of work done on a writing project every day (at least until I go away on the 24th). Main priority blaseball projects are, in no particular order:
Fic about the ending
Abner fic
Simon's Quest
secret fic(s) :)
get the Talkers exchange set up
Aside from that, I've been poking at more non-blaseball stuff, which is a good excuse for me to plug my writing blog @cyndakip! All my fics get posted there, so if you're interested in my writing beyond just blaseball (especially if you like pokemon), I recommend following me there, since I don't post non-blaseball fics here.
#I'm in a weird place rn where the end of blb is coinciding with me finally feeling ready to get back to nuzlockes#and I very much want to keep writing blb fics! it's just complicated by me getting smacked over the head with pokemon motivation#and separate from that I think it's just been hard for me to work on blb fics knowing that it's over#writing the ending fic in particular means confronting that. and I definitely haven't fully processed it yet and idk when I will#I really truly do want to keep writing blb fics for a long time but I worry there will be not much of an audience anymore#and I know that doesn't matter. I'm gonna write what I want and I know some people will still read it. but yknow. it's rough#also my relationship with pokemon and the nuzlocke community has been really fucking complicated these past few years#to the point where I stopped engaging altogether bc it was stressing me out too much and I had lost all confidence in my writing#this happened to be right before I got into blb. which came along at the perfect time and gave me the community & confidence boost I needed#now it kinda feels like we've come full circle. blb has changed me and now I'm ready to go back with a whole new attitude#I just don't want these two things to be mutually exclusive! I want both! but that's easier said than done#especially bc I haven't had enough energy to work on much of either lately! I want to say things are getting better on that front but#it's complicated. you know how it is with human bodies. treacherous things#the thing is I don't want to waste this. I feel ready for pokemon again and god I missed it and I'm gonna ride this wave of motivation#if I had more energy this would be less of a problem. ah well#gonna get all this done sooner or later#talking moistly
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How do ya know if green apples are ripe?
#[ like you care if it's ripe or not you eat everything and anything ]#[ HELLO GUYS ]#[ i still have some lingering fever but you know what? i'm gonna ignore it LOL ]#[ i wanna spend the day with HIM ]#[ later on i'm gonna edit a process video of my artwork of him through the years ]#[ collected 260+ pieces yesterday 8) ]#[ made me realize that i used to draw A LOT MORE ]#[ but to be fair to myself that was back when i put 0 effort into my art ]#[ and i could finish something in like 20 min ]#[ now it takes hours ]#[ ANYWAYS i'm !! hyped to write today! ]#[ hope you're all doing good! ]#despair for me. ╱ in character.
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